Friday, August 27, 2010

Supposed to be...........

didn't sleep at all last night.

i kept thinking about sawyer and the first time i was able to see him. how soft he felt, and i kept talking to him over and over (in that sing-song voice only a mother can do) so that he knew it was me.

"sawyer? it's me, mommy. it's mommy. i love you sawyer."

i dont even know if he heard me, because of all the drugs. i don't even know what color his eyes were. and i had hope, for about what? 8 hours??

he's supposed to be here, he's supposed to be here - that's all i think about.

5 comments:

Wyatt's Mommie said...

Funny you posted this today. I just had a "he is supposed to be here" moment last night.

Nicole said...

I am always having "she's supposed to be here" moments. I'll be grocery shopping and thinking about how she should be with me and I should be buying diapers and wipes and treating her to cute outfits. I think we'll always do that. And that's okay. <3

Anonymous said...

I stumbled upon your blog tonight. You are inspirational.

Michelle said...

thank you. that means so much to me tonight.

Laurie said...

Echo.

And love to all who know this :(