Friday, October 31, 2008

Halloween 2008

Man oh man what a great day.

Sadie had so much fun trick-or-treating with Kyan and Cris. Those two boys were so cute. Cris did a good job of asking for treats, but had many a trick up his sleeve when he tried to take candy out of the bowls of unsuspecting neighbors.

Dr. Moll and I talked for a long time outside in the front yard. I really love the guy. After about a half hour, he headed back home on his little scooter. About 45 minutes later, we hear the doorbell ringing like mad, and there he was with an armful of treats for everyone! I had to run after him and give the guy a big ol' hug.

The weather couldn't have been more perfect. The warmest Halloween I can remember. It was in the 70s all day, sunny and clear. It cooled off nice tonight with a crispness in the air that reminded us it was still very much Fall.

Sadie just looked so adorable in her little ladybug outfit. I was so excited to dress her up. Halloween ties with the Fourth of July in the second-place slot for favorite holidays (Christmas holds strong at number one of course).

Mom and dad made it onto the ship and were enjoying dinner when they called. I hope they have a great time. Although I'm sure gonna miss my mom.

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Autumn, how I love thee...

Crisp air, juicy apples, hot cider, carving pumpkings, pumpkin farms, those last fleeting days of summer and those very few days until winter, the smell of a bonfire roasting off in the woods, crunching leaves under my feet, the way the sun lights up the changing colors, breaking out warm sweaters, Halloween...

If you ever in your life get the chance, visit the Smokey Mountains in mid-to-late October and catch mother nature's free show. When you're driving through the mountains, you can almost get dizzy watching the colors fly by. We're going out there in May so maybe spring has just as an impressive display of color. Either way, can't wait!

Oh happy day

I had some Hoffman's Super Sharp Cheddar Cheese.

I ate a Kit-Kat for breakfast.

Washed it down with some Diet, Caffeine-Free Pepsi.

Munched a handle of Honey Nut Cheerios.

I love Halloweenie time.

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

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Mama's Little Peanut



I'm very excited. Sadie's first Halloween! Pictures to come shortly!

29 Candles

Yesterday was a pretty good day. Compared to the fiasco last Tuesday on my anniversary and not being able to go out over the weekend - my birthday was pretty uneventful (in a very good way).

On Saturday we pack up all our things and go home. I haven't been home since it was summer. Sadie went from one-two rolls a day to dozens and she's about to crawl. She gained two pounds and I probably gained ten.

I just want to put the past behind me as best as I can and move into the future with my family. It's hard to wake up, however, every day and be in chronic pain. My leg still hurts (although not as bad as before) but enough to get pissed off at it. My back muscles scream - they are so tight - but I'm doing this massage therapy stuff to help loosen and strengthen. I hope it works!

Honestly, I feel like I'm 49. I haven't felt like a person in their 20s since before I was 24.

Monday, October 27, 2008


I've been feeling really lost and out of sorts lately - and I know I need stimulation. A good movie, read a long book, take a class. Pretty much can squeeze the movie in - and I get too sidetracked for books.

And taking a class? I might as well laugh now. In fact - I will. Ha ha har.

With Erik's work schedule, it's next to impossible. I've really been wanting to take a traditional photography class (even going as far to buy an old school camera and learn how to develop the film, etc...) but even if it started at 7 p.m., it's still not late enough for me.

As an alternative, I will attempting to lug Sadie with me to the YMCA in Plainfield for mommy+baby swim classes. I think Sadie would enjoy it - there's really only one way to find out. I wonder if all the other moms will be skinny and perfect - stretch-mark free - no visible scarring.

On another note - sending lots of love and prayers to my aunt right now who lost her mom and sister within days of each other - And my uncle who has begun his fight against cancer. When it rains it pours.

Saturday, October 25, 2008


Erik and I were supposed to go out tonight for the first time since Sadie was born. A big night at a fancy place and fun afterward.

Sadie, however, turned into psycho baby and we just couldn't leave her at Mary's with her acting the way she is.

So, as an alternative, we figured we'd just have dinner at home...and get this - our favorite take-out place IS CLOSED.

Why do I consistently have the WORST luck!?

Wednesday, October 22, 2008


Haven't been going to well lately.

In a way though, they've sort of shined the light on why I might have been the way I was - and definitely why I love my life now and my husband for giving me the perspective and release I need in order to be me.

I don't know if my mom knows it, but she really has saved my ass while I've been here. She says that I yell at her all the time (any type of suggestion/criticism is taken as yelling) but I hope that she just understands the amount of appreciation I have toward what she's done for me.

Let's see - where do I begin...

She's changed the bandage and seen about every square inch of my most private of parts when I had the c-section. She helped me take a shower, sit, stand, eat and live at her house while I was going through a very bad time.

My mother - who is one of the most squeamish people I know - sat there and watched as my home nurse opened my gaping wound to show my mom how to clean and dress it if need be. She never flinched (even though she looked like she might throw up afterward).

And here we are today - she picks up that baby every single time she screams, cries, needs a diaper, is hungry, is sad, just wants a hug. She does all the things I can't do for her and so much more. I'm pretty sure my mom doesn't read my blog, but a piece of my heart will always belong to her for everything she's done for me, especially lately.

I hope she has the best of times on her cruise and gets the R&R she deserves. Some people think my stay here is like some sort of extended vacation - and some people need a kick in the face for that one.

Anywho - here's to you mom. For being there for me no matter what and loving me for who I am - faults and all. I love you!

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Dollinger Farm

What a fantastic day. If you are not doing anything tomorrow, get over to the Dollinger Family Farm for their pumpkin patch. It's Civil War Days and it's FREE.

All good things

Spent the night at my house for the first time in over five weeks and man was it great. We got home around 7ish but had to unload a ton of crap out of Sadie's room back into our room. Today, we'll rearrange the furniture and hang up our frames/pictures.

We had a nice, hot pizza from Pizza 4 U and it was so good. We sat around in comfy clothes, guzzled Pepsi and slumped into the couch for some TV. It was so refreshing.

The paint in the bedroom is great. I love it.

Today we go to Dollinger family farm for the pumpkin patch and Civil War Days. I'm so excited - I want to wake Sadie up from her nap and go NOW. I even have this cute little white 1800s-era bonnet for her to wear so she'll fit right in.

My mom bought me a pair of Levi's for my birthday and they are two sizes smaller than my old jeans from two years ago (haven't worn them in so long because I was pregnant last fall/winter).

I couldn't believe they fit me. I weighed myself at the PT office last week and I'm still the same weight as I was the week after I had her. So i'm pretty proud of myself for keeping the weight off when I haven't been able to do any sort of physical activity besides walking.

I still can't fathom the idea that I was over 50lbs heavier than I am now just a little over a year ago. How I carried that weight around I have no idea. My goal is to lose another 25-35 lbs within a year or two. Then when we're ready to have another baby I'll be physically ready.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Fun on the floor

On the phone - long, long distance

Early last summer - before I found out I was pregnant and without a job - I filled out an app for the Obama campaign. Tra La La La Tra La....

Time passes, I hear nothing.

All of a freakin sudden - over the past 3 months my phone has been ringing off the hook. Apparently, a media background is much desired at this crucial point in the campaign? I dunno...

Anywho - Obviously haven't had any time to lend seeing as I'm consistently hospitalized every few months so I graciously decline.

However - they called again yesterday and have an office set up right by Nick's Steakhouse in Mokena - just looking for someone to do phones, make sure people are registered to vote, call for rally's in Ind., etc.

I might just see if I can swing a few hours a week. But it's enough that my mom is already trapped here with Sadie 24/7 - might not be a good time to ask for some "me" time away from here for the campaign.

Regardless, the idea is on the back burner. And if anyone wants the guy's number that called me, I'd be more than happy to put you in touch.

Obama 08!

Pure Ignorance

I'm literally ill after watching this:

Last time I checked it was 2008, not 1958.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

My poor baby!

Well, it's tooth cutting time here in the Tarrant house and I'm sure most of Briarwood Lane knows about it too.

She has a teeny, tiny bud on the right side of her mouth that should cut through the gums any morning now. In the meantime, we're combating the issue by shoving teething tablets into her mouth before she wakes up from every nap. Seems to be working pretty good.

But, tonight - we had forgotten to give her any teething tabs for quite a bit of time - and she woke up screaming in pain around 11 p.m. My mom had never heard her cry like that before and she immediately turned from grandma-mode into mom-mode.

My mom tried to bounce and soothe her for a while, but it was a futile effort - so I took Sadie and she stopped crying long enough to catch her breath and let me shove some tabs into her sore little mouth.

My mom just put her down and it looks like we've got her sleeping and pain-free for the time being. It's pretty exciting to see her first tooth almost sprouting forth! But, I won't put anything down in the baby book until that sucker rips through those pink gums.

On that note - I'm exhausted and have therapy pretty early in the morning. Nighty night folks.

Tuesday, October 7, 2008

Monday, October 6, 2008

Rolling with the punches

Another 30 days to go here and it honestly seems like an eternity at this point.

I love my mom and what she's doing for me, but I'm going crazy here. There is a constant tug of war between how she wants to do things with Sadie and how I want to do them. I know I'm getting on her nerves and vice versa - but it's a delicate balance to try and not explode.

I can't run out and vent either. I can't get very far on foot, drive a car or just scream. It's really starting to get to me.

I want things to be normal and I feel like there has never been a normal for us since the baby got here. It's always been this or that - Abnormal is the norm.

I miss sleeping next to my husband at night. I miss my sweet, snuggly cat, the smell of my house, my bed and most important - my life.

I feel like I've had to adjust my life to fit into everyone else's. It's a really hard spot to be in. Whenever I ask my mom not to do something with the baby, she takes it personal - like I'm yelling at her and not appreciative of what she's doing. It's not that at all. I'm just trying to maintain some sort of control over anything in my life at this point.

Hopefully, the next few weeks go by fast for everyone.

Sunday, October 5, 2008

Thursday, October 2, 2008

Bargain shoppers!


Went to Target tonight with my ma and found the PERFECT framed art to hang in my newly painted bathroom! That isn't the best part. The best part is that the two frames combined cost less than $15!

And my mom went nuts and bought all of her kids their big Christmas present (no I'm not telling!) but it's an AMAZING gift she got dirt cheap!

I swear, my mom and I really bond over shopping.

I will have to take pics of the bathroom with the artwork when I get home and get it on the walls. I'm SO excited about it. I still can't believe the price!

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

Extended stay

Looks like I'll be staying at my parent's for another four weeks at least. It sucks, but I gotta do it. Don't really want to screw things up at this point or get a metal rod shoved up my back. That would be embarrassing during security checks I'm sure.

I've been getting my old migraines back and they're started to get pretty consistent. But, I think once I start physical therapy tomorrow, they'll start to get better. I'm really excited to begin PT - it's always a good step toward full recovery.

The house is pretty quiet without Thelma huffing and puffing around. When Erik left tonight, I was like watch out for Thelma - then thought, she isn't here. Old habits die hard.

Karlene has been having a rough time lately. I feel really bad for her. She's got a full plate and just when you think there isn't any room left - life doles out another helping of madness. I hope things settle down for her soon. I'm really thinking about her a lot. Stress is incredibly overwhelming - it can take over your brain in an instant. But, she's one of the toughest women I know - if anyone can get through it all, she can.

On a sidenote I am really loving this weather - but am not able to get out and enjoy it as much as I'd like to. We were going to take Sadie to the pumpkin farm this weekend, but the doctor said no - maybe next weekend instead. But, come hell or high water we're going!

My dad painted our archway and bathroom yesterday and Erik said it looks fantastic! I'm really excited to see how it turned out. The last room to get done is our bedroom - but it's turning out to be a bitch because the wallpaper the old lady had on as a border was freakin superglued to the wall. It's nearly impossible to get off. But Erik's gonna try his darndest!

I'll take pictures when we get over there. Maybe Saturday. Who knows!?

Hope everyone has a nice week.